Buffalo School Board To Vote On Kriner Cash ‘Stache Style

#CashStache Better 1, or Better 2?

It’s seems a forgone conclusion that Dr. Kriner Cash, candidate for Buffalo Schools Superintendent will receive broad, if not unanimous support for his appointment when the board meets Tuesday to vote on the issue. However, that does not mean that there will not be any controversy when the board assembles, as they are also expected to vote on which mustache style they will mandate Dr. Cash to wear.

In the past, Dr. Cash sported a fuller mustache that went down from his nose to his lip.  More recently, he has worn a thinner style mustache that merely outlines his upper lip.

The Buffalo School Board met in executive session last week to discuss the issue. Afterwards, two camps clearly emerged on the issue.

Boardmember Dr. Theresa Harris-Tigg:

Dr. Cash’s current facial hair style is the best choice going forward as we continue the tremendous task of improving our schools.  His “pencil-thin” look emphasizes the “pencil”, one of the single greatest icons of schools in our country. His sharp look reminds us that we must all “sharpen our pencils” and get ready to work.

While currently out of town on “business”, failed gubernatorial candidate, current Buffalo School Board member/legal fee generator, and all-around racially sensitive rich guy Carl Paladino had this to say:

My support for Dr. Cash is contingent on him doing a few things for me, the least of which is returning to his manly “chevron” mustache of his past. Powerful, manly, it evokes the scent of musk and leather, and a whiff of scotch. This is the facial hair of a man who will do what it takes, without putting up with bullshit, similar to Magnum P.I. or Mike Ditka. The authority it projects will do well when dealing with the asshole teachers union and the “hyphenated women” on this board.

Unreliable sources indicate that #CashStache is trending on Twitter currently, as the general public is taking to social media to make their opinions known on which mustache they prefer.

Buffalo Mayor Byron Brown has weighed in on the matter, putting his support behind the “thin lip-stache”.



The Buffalo School Board meets Tuesday at noon.

Be the first to comment on "Buffalo School Board To Vote On Kriner Cash ‘Stache Style"

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.